Saturday, April 30, 2011


I just came across an old card.  Just wanted to post what I had written it in.  Strangely enough, this is one of the few things I recovered from the office.  It was dated May 9th, 2010. This was before I discovered everything else, and only knew the basics.
 "I love you. I will always love you. And as much as I love you, I cannot sit back and watch you destroy yourself. You have a choice. Me and your family, or the dope. If you go back to using again, I will leave you for the last time. You will not see me. You will not see my kids. You are my best friend and it kills me to tell you this. You are without a doubt the love of my life, but I will not sit back and watch you destroy yourself. I will not help you destroy yourself. You are too smart and too talented to waste your life. Whatever it takes, I will be here to catch you. I will be by your side to help you get better. I will be there to hold your hand when it's hard and I will cheer for you when you succeed, but I will not watch you do this. I know you can't see the man you once were, but I can. He's the man I fell in love with and the man I want to grow old with and right now, you are not that man. But he is in there somewhere. I am your girlfriend and it is my job to tell you when you are screwing up. Well guess what? You are screwing up. I cannot physically, mentally, or emotionally do this anymore. So you have one hell of a decision to make."
I left this letter sealed with his secretary. He came home to me less than an hour later, in tears begging me not to leave him... that he would do whatever it took to be with me. And he has. And he has stumbled. And he will pick himself back up again. It will not always be perfect. It may take time to heal old hurts. But it will be done. And time will tell the rest.  Now comes the waiting patiently part...something I've never been good at.

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